Just arrived in North Tyneside for the second part of my trip. I write this from a country park. I am sat next to a huge sun dial with a fantastic view of Newcastle City and the coast. I stopped here on a whim just to pass time before I can check into the hotel and spa. I am glad I did!
I’ve mentioned in recent posts I have had plenty of time to think recently. I have realised a few things whilst traveling and I am feeling more content with how things are in my life right now. I am making progress with positive future thinking. Its good to have plans to focus on when other more negative things happen.
To extent life is what you make of it, or thats how things seem to me. Happiness is not present in all areas of my life. There is always something unknown in life.
In a few weeks I will be facing one of my biggest fears head on. Its unavoidable, and I am planning for the worst. I take the good when it happens, and deal with the bad times the best I can. But I am not immune to fear, and I live with my anxiety disorder on a regular basis.
It’s harder to think about all the positives when a potentially life changing event is on the horizon. But in life there are things that are simply beyond my control. This has to happen, and the outcome will be what it will be.
We all have difficult times in life. I have been anticipating this for two years now. There are options to delay, but it will always be there, waiting in the darkness.
I am scared, but I also know this in part is fear of the unknown. This looming event should give me answers that I need.
I don’t what the future holds, I don’t know what this particular path will lead to. But I also know it isn’t everything in my life.
Good with the bad. I’m not trying to be brave, and I won’t say I am OK if it turns out I am not.
But for now I wait, and keep moving forward.