Blog: Just the way I am feeling

Hello

I hope you are all having a great weekend.  I have had a better weekend, focusing on stuff that makes me happy.

I’ve felt a little stressed out of late, a little bit too much uncertainty on a few points in life has spiked my anxiety.  A little time away this weekend was good, but I know I am not feeling better yet, as a few small things caused anxiety over the course of the weekend too. I’ve said it time and gain, its ok not to be ok.  Recognising you are not ok can be harder than you think.  Taking the next step and realising you need to do something about it is even tougher.

I don’t claim to have all the answer, I never would.  I’ve been through a lot in life, particularly in the last few years. I often write about my own experience and how I am feeling. 

Over this weekend, I did manage to have a bit of a breakthrough in identifying some of my recent stress factors, which is good.  Now I have identified them, I can start to work on solutions.  Its not as simple as ok this is stressing me out, lets bury my head in the sand.  Dealing with anxiety, depression or stress has no quick fix.  It can often involve some difficult conversations, or at least it can feel difficult to the person who is experiencing the mental ill health condition.

I thankfully am still feeling functional, depending on how my anxiety manifests, it can sometimes be difficult to be as functional.  Almost three years of trying, I’ve got a good set of tools and coping measures. But there is not fix for everything.

I am writing this on Sunday evening – I am back to work tomorrow and I have a busy day ahead.  In some ways keeping busy will help, in others spending more time talking about work than having time to do it can be difficult. Many of us experience the Sunday night blues, and that’s not something I am immune to either.

I am aiming to tackle some of my stress factors full on in the coming days – if that means some difficult conversations, than so be it. No one is going to look out for me or solve anything for me, when it comes down to it – how I act is what matters.

I often plan for the future, but sometimes its about getting through the moment.  My friend Jack has been supporting me a lot over the last week, that I am grateful for.  I am following his advice, it might sounds cliched, but it is true, for now, I am taking it one step at a time.

I choose to act for the better, even if it can been daunting.

Jack is telling me I’ve got this, and I choose to believe that too.

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