8760, that is the number of hours in a year.

We do not often see a year broken down to hours, but there are 8760 of them in a year. We live each and every one of these hours, some of them are filled with joy, some are mundane and occasionally some of them are filled with trauma. Many of them are also filled with sleep.

Today marks eight years since my Dad died. That’s 105,120 hours since he left us. We often think about long periods of times in years, but with bereavement it can often be the hours that matter the most. Every year on 13 January I think of the number 8760, another block of hours since my Dad passed away.

Bereavement and loss is not a linear path, sometimes it is easier than others. This 13 January I’ve felt in a lower mood and more emotional than I did last year. I’m not really sure why, its just how it has presented itself this year. Sometimes I feel the loss with a memory flashing back to 13 January 2018, others it’s a flash back to a memory of better times from his life. That can both ease a feeling or reignite a sense of loss. Its not just contained to this date in the calendar, but its definitely a day that draws it to the surface. Another 8760 hours have passed.

I am a person who thrives on routine and habit. I know myself pretty well on what helps me live a positive life. So today I am drawing on my routines and habits the best I can. I’ve had my lunch time walk to the local country park. This is where my Dad’s memorial bench is located, and I spent my usual few minutes sat there and thinking of him. And also enjoying the view of the park.

Loss and grief is not linear and can look very different for each person. If you encounter someone grieving, approach with kindness and compassion. You don’t need to have all the answers, but believe me, a message saying hello is very nice to receive. Sadly, when my Dad passed, I didn’t hear from many friends for a few days because they “didn’t know what to say.” The people that just said hello really did help.

Life is short, and I never take it for granted. Any 24 hours could be my final hours of life.

Don’t put things off, send that message to say Hi. Start that new project, hobby or change you want to make. It could well be your final chance to do so. Your final hours are rarely predictable.

It is always ok, not to be ok.

 Some hours are easier than others.

What will you do with the next 8760 hours?